I didn’t realize while sitting in the jury box that I was dissociating. Once I was dismissed, I proceeded to go home. Jury duty was on a Monday. I was off Tuesday and went back to work on Wednesday.
I was anxious and tense, particularly when other coworkers came into the room I worked in. This was not usual behavior for me. I didn’t want to interact with them. It seemed too fearful to do that. Only when I absolutely had to say something, was when I spoke. A really old behavior. I don’t remember if I said anything about this or not, so something for a future post.
This fear, anxiousness, and stress continued for a couple of weeks. I was unable to get rid of it. Something triggered me in a major way though I had no idea what it was.
After a couple of weeks, I made an appointment with my doctor concerning my anxiety. I have had issues with anxiety before, but not for this long or severe, at least it had been a long time.
At my doctor appointment, she mentioned that it was unusual for me to be there, since I usually only see her every six months. I mentioned my jury duty along with the dissociation and shakiness I felt that day. She proceeded to document my experience in case in her laptop, just in case I ever got called for jury duty again. I’ll have a doctor’s note to dismiss me. If I had felt safe enough, I would have asked for a private meeting to discuss my issues.
My doctor prescribed an antianxiety medication for me, which I had taken for a short time before (a month or so) while I was going through a difficult time. So, I went on this medication I’d taken once before to hopefully take care of these hopefully temporary feelings. I was surprised my doctor remembered my former therapist, I told my doctor that situation and mentioned I do talk to someone today. That person is my massage therapist/certified holistic life coach, who I might add is fantastic.
More on my session with my massage therapist and what came up.
As always, feel free to comment or ask any questions or topics you’d like me to cover. I also plan on doing audio podcasts on the website, hopefully in the near future.